Lazy Bum?
We can all fall through with tasks we need to do for ourselves, or should do for others. We may have nice thoughts about completing a project, but are slow to taking action. For instance, the dishes. My mom would appreciate if I just went ahead and washed the dishes without being told. I love my mom and would like to see her relieved of constant hard work; however, I often do not get up to do the dishes even when provoked by my conscience. Why? I am too comfortable staying put. Whether that be on my couch or underneath the covers of my bed. Maybe my phone has put me in a trance or the blankets surrounding my body are keeping me at the perfect temperature on a chilly evening. Whatever the case, it is inconvenient to do the “right thing”. I know if I erect myself out of my position to do the chore, I will be satisfied in my accomplishment. Washing the dishes is a menial, standard responsibility that all households partake in. Just because it is the standard, does not make it insignificant or inherently easy. There is a certain level of embarrassment I experience when I cannot bring myself to complete simple chores. Inability to control simple parts of my daily life is defeating. However, it is not uncommon. Plenty of other people struggle with attention issues and executive functioning.
My thoughts race a mile a minute with no follow through. One thing is certain: you can intend to be productive, but never get around to it. I have to remind myself how my immovability is not a poor reflection on my character. Unfortunately, there is a misunderstanding between other people and myself. I do not intend to upset others when I am not tidy, I just lack proper focus. Desiring to do a good job is not enough. People look for a finished product with high expectations. For this reason, I go to God to ask for strength and self awareness. Leading me on the correct path like a dog on a leash refusing to heel to its owner; the Lord is constantly reeling me in to grow beside Him. Even when I am heavily critiqued, I try to remain positive. Not a deceptive positivity of how amazing I am, but a truthful reminder of how God is invested in my development. God wants me to succeed in serving others and taking care of myself. He is cheering me on to always try again.
Even if it is impractical to cure my distractive nature, I can still permit the Lord know how bothered I am by it. The act of drawing near to God will automatically give some attention to the One I long to obey. A difficult aspect of the Christian walk is knowing God will not always come through in the ways I request Him to. He has no obligation to follow the orders I bark at Him. His hope is for me to form a habit of approaching Him as a form of worship and acknowledgement that all things come from Him. God longs to expose me to new wisdom. He will have infinite wisdom for the rest of eternity. I, on the other hand, will always have something new to learn about what to label as truthful and valuable. I know from reading Scripture that health and success are valuable. As God is my Lord, He has the authority to define what health and success will look like in my personal life story. To dedicate my life pursuing God means putting down my own desires and leaning in to His blueprint for my faith journey.
Additionally, it is important for me to communicate with other people when I am struggling. Not my favorite thing to do. Instead, I would rather assign blame to someone or something else… or divert the topic of conversation. Avoidance does not bring about progress or healing. It causes division and frustration. When I am struggling to help out around the house, I should speak up to my mom saying “I have the desire to wash the dishes, but my anxiety and racing thoughts are taking over my body and mind at the moment. Will you please witness me as I set a timer to complete this task? Can you please hold me accountable for a job well done in a timely fashion?” This type of dialogue will open a door for my mom to notice my intentions and dilemma coinciding with it. If only she knew the reason for why I am not stepping up to assist her, then she would partner with me to overcome my challenges. What prevents me from honesty is shame. I become so wrapped up in my need to be perfect that when I cannot measure up, I panic and make poor choices. Shame is a false narrative regarding myself rooted in fear. If I am not forthcoming, people will have the wrong perceptions about my priorities. I definitely care about honoring my parents and their house. Failing to communicate will cause pain and confusion, and risk damage to my relationships. Deceiving the people I love will rip success from my hands.
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 (KJV)
Attention problems can present a heavy burden to households. If you have trouble and feel as though you are a burden to others, know this is not unusual. You see, everyone has flaws and cannot measure up to our perfect God. Allowing someone in on your struggles will stir up compassion in them as they look in the mirror and reflect on their own shortcomings. Submit to God’s definition of you as His child, and remind other people of your worth. Ask yourself, “do I really have a lazy mindset? Or am I overpowered by a condition out of my control?” It is a waste of time to wish you were someone else. Instead, catch a vision of how God can transform you in the midst of your chaos.